I don’t even know where to begin with this posting. I am just feeling really sad (down in the dumps, so to speak) this week. There have been so many recent delays within the China adoption program that it seems like we’ll never get there. At the start of our journey, everyone said our wait would be about a year, then 14 months, then 16 months, then 18 months, now 2-3 years (maybe more). China is only done matching children to families who had their documents logged in up until November 1, 2005. Yes, that’s right…2005. Our dossier was only logged in February 2007. Emily might very well be 6 by the time she becomes a big sister. I find myself crying for Mike and I, and also crying for her. It’s just very frustrating and disheartening. We started the adoption process in December 2005 (with Russia)and switched from the Russia program (after 7 months) to China, because Russia became too complicated and unstable….and China seemed like a smooth, predictable program. It seems like as soon as we switched countries, all of the delays in China started. Why does this black cloud seem to follow us wherever we go? Our documents have already been redone by us 2-3 times, and will most likely be done 4-5 times by the time this process is over.

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t like to complain. I have a great husband and daughter and am grateful for my family beyond words. I just really want this adoption to work out. “Why don’t you just get pregnant?”, you ask. Well, because we know our daughter is in China. We are adopting by choice (aka it is not a second choice for us)…we know that this is what we want and what we are meant to do. I won’t lie, though. It does make it more frustrating at times to know that, if we chose to, I could give birth to 1, 2 or even 3 kids in the same amount of time as this adoption will likely take.

So…I guess what I’m asking for is that all of you who read this just keep us (and our sanity) in your prayers. It’s going to be a long road.

P.S. I added a link to the China Center of Adoption Affairs (CCAA) website, so you can watch with us (or cry, as the case may be), when CCAA posts their progress (with processing families' paperwork/ matching children with families) on the website.